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About Bologna

Lemme spill – I got dragged to one once, friend swore it’d “loosen me up.” Me? Tight as a drum, dahling, no capes, no nonsense! Walked in, dim lights, weird oils, some chick whisperin’ bout “energy flow.” I’m like, “Honey, my energy’s fine, just don’t touch my glasses!” But oh, when she started? Hands like magic, I melted faster than a popsicle in July. Made me happy, like, whoa, why’d I wait so long? Little known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got this stuff to “balance their chi” – fancy, huh? Bet they weren’t moanin’ bout taxes then!

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Then, the craziest thing happened. I bumped into an old friend from high school. Can you believe it? We hadn’t seen each other in years! We ended up chatting for hours. Turns out, he’s a chef now. He invited me to his restaurant. I was like, “Dude, I’m in!”