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About Schellenberg

So, erotic-massage, yeah, it’s old as dirt. Ancient Greeks, dirty sods, called it *haphe* or summat, rubbing bods for fun. Egyptians too, Cleopatra, saucy minx, got her lads oiled up daily – fact! Makes me chuffed, thinkin’ how humans never change. Bit of a knead, bit of a tease, *et voila*, happy as Larry! But – cor blimey – some places charge a bomb, £100 for an hour? Robbery! Got me fumin’, that did, greedy gits.

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Then, I get a call from my next client. Let’s call her “Miss Overthinker.” She’s in a panic about her life choices. I’m like, “Chill, you’re in Triesen! You’ve got time!” But she’s all “What if I mess up?” I’m thinking, “Girl, we all mess up!” But I keep it cool.

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