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Alright, listen up, ya little degenerates! I’m comin’ at ya like Judge Judy on a bender, and we’re talkin’ escorts today—yep, the paid-to-play kinda company. Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I know what’s up! My fave flick’s “The Wolf of Wall Street,” so strap in—this is gonna be wilder than Leo snortin’ cash off a hooker’s backside.

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But then, I see this guy tryin’ to haggle over a cucumber. Like, dude, it’s a cucumber! Just buy it! I can’t help but laugh. Otaci’s got characters, I swear.

Raisa Preida, Roma activist: “The time when the life of a Roma woman was limited to being a wife and a mother who stays mostly at home needs to be over.”