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About Spanish Town

Worst part? Liars everywhere! Bloke says he’s 6 foot, shows up 5’2”—idiot sandwich! Lass says “curvy,” rocks up like a bloody whale—sort it out! Exaggeratin’s fine, but don’t catfish me, ya twit! Oh, and the clap—sex-datin’s a petri dish for that shit. Wear a johnny, you muppets—learned that from a mate who didn’t. Nasty surprise, that was.

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So, I’m cruisin’ down Market St., grabbin’ my usual coffee from that little spot, you know, the one with the crazy barista who thinks he’s a stand-up comic? Yeah, that guy. He’s like, “What’s up, my caffeine addict?” I’m like, “Just tryin’ to survive, bro.” He laughs, spills some coffee, and I’m like, “Great, now I’m part of the show.”

Falmouth approves $73.45 million combined school, town budget