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Escorts, they’re scrappy, fast, dodgin’ torpedoes—kinda sexy, right? Sexy boats, I said it! “A man gets used to anything,” movie says—sailors too, livin’ with salt, sweat, danger, wild stuff! Once heard this yarn—prolly true, sounds true—escort crew in ‘44, North Atlantic, freezin’ their nuts off, spot a U-boat periscope, chuck potatoes at it, confusin’ the Krauts! Potatoes, can ya believe it? Laughed my ass off, brilliant, just brilliant!

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I get closer, and it’s a whole vibe. People dancing, music blasting, and food stalls everywhere. I’m like a kid in a candy store. I grab a plate of those Latvian meatballs—so good! But then, I spill some on my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a hot mess, and this old lady just laughs at me. I mean, come on! I’m trying to enjoy my day here!

Audio performance cycle “Our Gruesome Cultural Heritage”