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Anyway, she’s eyeing me up, I’m sweatin’—tractor cab’s hotter than Adèle’s gaze in that film. I’m thinkin’, “This is my moment, my blue warmth!” Mutter to meself, “Stay calm, Brentster, you’re the king of banter.” I go, “Fancy a ride on me John Deere?” She’s like, “What’s that, ya twat?” Laughed me arse off—proper icebreaker! Told her, “It’s not just a tractor, it’s a lifestyle”—she weren’t impressed.

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After the show, I’m exhausted but happy. I grab a beer at a local pub on Skagenkaien. The sun’s setting, and the sky’s all pink and orange. I’m sitting there, soaking it all in. Stavanger’s got this vibe, man. It’s chill but exciting. I love it here.

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