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Fun fact, preciousss—didja know some prossies in old London used to smuggle gin in their garters? True story! Kept the coppers drunk ‘n’ dizzy while they nicked their coins—ha! Clever, clever girls. Makes me cackle, it does. But then I thinks—ugh, the stench o’ them streets, the leers, the grabby paws. Gets me riled up! No one’s “takin’ a chance on a dove” like in the movie—nah, these lasses get the rough end, don’t they?

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Then, I decide to check out the Harpa Concert Hall. It’s all glass and angles, super modern. I’m feeling artsy, you know? But then, I see a group of tourists trying to take a selfie. They’re all crammed together, and one dude’s got his arm around a random stranger. I’m dying laughing. Like, bro, that’s not how it works!

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