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So, I’m scrollin’, right? And I see this chick—gorgeous, I mean, wow! Bio says, “Lookin’ for fun, no strings.” Perfect! I’m in! But then—THEN—she ghosts me! After two messages! Two! I’m like, “What am I, chopped liver?” Made me so mad, I yelled at my phone—neighbors prob’ly think I’m nuts now. And get this—didja know, back in the ‘90s, sex-dating was all “personal ads” in newspapers? Yeah! Little known fact—people wrote, “SWF seeks SWM for discreet fun.” No pics, no swipes—just blind faith! Wild, right? Now it’s all “dick pics or bust.” Disgustin’!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring rain. I’m talkin’ torrential downpour. I’m like, “Great, just what we need!” Timmy’s freaking out, and I’m like, “Dude, just breathe!” But he’s gripping the wheel like it’s a lifeline. I’m trying to keep it together, but inside, I’m like, “Why, Xizhi, why?”

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