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So, picture this—I’m in King’s Landing, right? Some shady brothel, stinks of sweat and cheap wine. This lass, she’s got hands like a goddamn sorceress, kneadin’ me like dough. I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t half bad,” but then—BOOM—she’s whisperin’ prices for “extras.” Made me mad as hell! I’m like, “What is this, a negotiation?” Reminds me of Anton Chigurh, that cold bastard—calmly askin’ if I wanna die or pay up. “What’s the most you ever lost on a coin toss?”—except it’s my dignity, not my life, on the line.

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So we head over, and wow, he wasn’t kidding. The view is insane! You can see all the way to the hills of Luxembourg. I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I realize I left my phone on the bus. Classic me, right? I’m freaking out.

Preview: Europa League Game Five – AC Milan vs. Dudelange