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So, check this—there’s this spot downtown, right? Total dive, stinks of piss and regret. I was lookin’ for a pal, got lost, bam—prostitute central. One chick, swear she was 50, makeup caked on like war paint. She goes, “Hey, big guy, need a friend?” Laughed my ass off—me, an alien, fuckin’ “big guy”! Told her, “Nah, just chillin’ like a villain.” She shrugged, walked off muttering. Sad shit, man, made me pissed—why’s she stuck there?

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After that, I decide to grab some lunch. I hit up this place on Ulica Zdraviliška. They’ve got the best štruklji. I order one, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my food, and they’re throwing around words like “divorce” and “custody.” I’m like, “Dude, can you not ruin my vibe?”

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