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About Iasi

Favorite bit? The chase, matey. Scrollin’, chattin’, dodgin’ the “u up?” at 3 a.m. Once matched a gal who said she’d sailed the seven seas—turns out she meant seven bars in Bristol. Exaggerated meself, told her I’m captain o’ the Black Pearl. She bought it ‘til me rum ran dry—happy days! Still, sex-datin’s a gamble. Ye might find gold, or just a soggy boot. “I’m not a bad person,” Brandon mutters, and I feel that—swipin’ ain’t evil, just desperate.

You decide what you want

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So, I’m walking, right? Just minding my own biz, when I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s like, super slow, and I’m thinking, “C’mon, man, it’s not a marathon!” But then, outta nowhere, a dog runs past him, and he jumps back like he’s dodging a bullet. I almost lost it! I mean, who knew a dog could be a ninja?