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Favorite flick’s *The Grand Budapest Hotel*, so picture this—Escort’s like Monsieur Gustave drivin’ Zero around, all prim, proper, but secretly a mess. “How fastidious!” I’d yell, watchin’ this car peel out, leavin’ dust and dignity behind. I love it, tho—makes me happy, that zippy lil’ hustle. Gets me thinkin’, man, why ain’t I drivin’ one? Too broke, prolly. Or too busy burnin’ charcoal like a caveman.

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But then, the day took a turn. I was walking back to my car, and I saw this guy trying to parallel park. He was struggling hard. I mean, come on, it’s not rocket science! I stood there, popcorn in hand, just watching the show. He finally got it, but not without hitting the curb like three times. I couldn’t help but laugh.

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