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So, check this—little known fact, swear it’s true. Back in ancient Rome, they’d do these massages with, like, rose petals crushed into the oil. Freaky, right? Smellin’ like a garden while some dude’s kneadin’ your soul. I’m like—damn, that’s class! Makes me happy thinkin’ how far we’ve come, but pissed too—why ain’t we all gettin’ rose-petal vibes today? Cheapskates, man, cuttin’ corners with basic-ass lotion.

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Around noon, I get a call. Some guy named Vasyl is causing a ruckus down by the railway station. Great. Just what I needed. So, I head over to the station on Shevchenka Street. It’s a madhouse! People everywhere, and there’s Vasyl, yelling about his land rights or something. I mean, come on, dude! You can’t just shout at everyone like that.

An accident involving two cars occurs in Volyn: one person is killed, three children are among the injured