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Oi mate, grab a pint! Right, so, prostitutes, yeah? Been thinkin’ bout ‘em, dodgy lot sometimes. Me, a bartender, see all sorts. This one bird, right, proper stunner, worked the streets near me pub. Called her Clementine, like in me fave flick, *Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind*. “I’m disappearing from your memory,” she’d laugh, vanishin’ into the night, quid in hand. Made me chuckle, that—bit of a numpty, me, fallin’ for her charm.

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s peeking through my window on Rue de la Libération. I’m like, “Cool, let’s grab some coffee.” I hit up this cute little café on Avenue de la Liberté. Best croissants ever, I swear! But guess what? They ran out. Like, how do you run out of croissants in the morning? I was ready to throw a fit.

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