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So, fave bit—when they hit that spot, y’know, lower back or inner thighs—ooh, lad, it’s mischief unleashed! Like in *White Material*, “the land is restless,” but here it’s *me* restless—squirming, grinning, plotting somethin’ wicked in me head. Pro tip: hot stones—game changer! Feels like lava, but sexy lava, melts ya right down. Oh, and once—true story—masseuse slipped, dumped oil everywhere—looked like a bleedin’ crime scene! Laughed my arse off—happy accident, that!

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s Oleg again. “Get back to the office!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’m on my way.” I rush back, dodging people and potholes. Perehinske streets are like an obstacle course!