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What pisses me off? These clowns catfishing! Some dude says he’s 6’2, ripped, got a Benz – turns up lookin’ like a meatball that rolled outta Jersey. Waste’a my time! I ain’t here for no bait-n-switch, capisce? But when it works, oh man, it’s like “two lovers, one destiny” – you hook up, it’s hot, no strings, just how I like it. Got this one gal, met her on Tinder, she’s all about the quickie life. Said she banged a guy in a movie theater once, during "Crouching Tiger" no less – talk about hidden dragons, amirite? Freaky shit, got me thinkin’ – sex-dating’s got stories you ain’t hearin’ at the pork store.

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After that, I decide to take a breather and head to the park by Edsviken. It’s beautiful there, man. The water, the trees, the whole vibe. I plop down on a bench, sipping my coffee, and just chill for a sec. But then, outta nowhere, this group of teenagers starts blasting music. Like, I get it, you’re young and cool, but come on! I’m trying to enjoy nature here, not a rave.

Sweden is struggling to get rising gang violence under control