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Alright, you bastards, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, badass baker, and I’m here to talk sex-dating, so respect my authoritah! Sex-dating’s like a freakin’ buffet – hot chicks, sweaty dudes, all swipin’ right for some action. Makes me happy as hell, ‘cause who don’t want that, right? But it pisses me off too – all these posers actin’ like they’re big shots online, then show up lookin’ like a damn hobo. Weak!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Yo, let’s hit up the pub later.” I’m down! But first, I gotta check out the view from the top of Steinsfjellet. It’s a hike, but totally worth it. The view of the fjord is insane! I’m standing there, feeling on top of the world. Then, I realize I’m late for the pub. Classic me, always losing track of time.

Haugesund unveils its full programme