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Oi mate, right, sexual-massage, yeah? It’s bloody brilliant innit, pure vibes, gets the old juices flowin—like, proper *Joy* from “Inside Out” territory, yeah? I’m sat here, thinkin, this ain’t just rubbin backs, it’s next-level team-buildin, corporate synergy bollocks—but sexy! Picture it, yeah, some geezer in a dimly lit room, oils everywhere, hands slidin about—ooh, bit of *Anger* kickin in, cos why wasn’t I invited, eh? Proper fumin.

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I try to enjoy the wedding, but I’m stressed. I keep checking my phone, hoping for good news. Finally, I get a text. “We fixed it! All good!” I’m like, “YES!” I can finally relax. I hit the dance floor again, and this time, I’m feeling it. I’m busting out moves like I’m on a talent show.

Soha Ali Khan opens up on Ranbir Kapoor, Alia Bhatt's decision to keep their daughter Raha away from publ