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So, I’m all hyped—cringey optimism alert—cause who doesn’t love a good massage with a *twist*? I mean, I’d be like, “Sorta, kinda, wanna touch ya!”—straight from the movie, baby! Last week, I googled it—18 typos later, oops—and found out some parlors get shady. Made me mad, ya know? Ruins the chill vibe! But when it’s legit? Oh man, happy vibes all day! Stress gone, shoulders loose, and maybe a sneaky wink from the masseuse—haha, “That’s what she said!”

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But then, I see a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I’m like, “Man, I miss those days.” I used to be a soccer star, or at least I thought I was. Now, I’m just a broker trying to make sense of the real estate jungle.

HDB BTO June 2024: Jurong East, Kallang/Whampoa, Queenstown, Tampines, Woodlands, Yishun