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But here’s what gets me goat – some prudes call it dodgy. Oi, lighten up, ya squares! It’s just a massage with a naughty twist. Surprised me how bloody good it felt – like No-Face gobblin’ up them bathhouse treats, but less creepy. I’m all, “Do I look like I give a toss?” – nah, I’m lovin’ it! Fun fact: ancient Greeks did this too, callin’ it “therapeia” or somefink. Bet they were randy buggers!

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Then, just when I think it can’t get worse, it starts pouring. I’m talking monsoon-level rain. I’m drenched, and my hair’s a mess. I look like a wet dog. I’m standing under the shelter at Punggol Park, trying to catch my breath, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, what a day, right?

WP bets on Punggol, Tampines GRCs to make further in roads | School of Social Sciences | NTU Singapore