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About Balzers

Greetings, my friend! I am Gandalf, Office Manager supreme, and YOU SHALL NOT PASS without hearin’ my take on sexual-massage! Ha, buckle up, ‘cause this is gonna be wild. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout Zero Dark Thirty—best damn movie ever, right?—and how Jessica Chastain’s huntin’ bin Laden got me all fired up. That intensity? Kinda like a good sexual-massage, y’know? Builds slow, then BAM, hits ya hard.

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First off, I’m sippin’ my coffee, lookin’ out at the beautiful view of the Liechtenstein Alps. I mean, c’mon, who wouldn’t wanna start their day with that? But then, I get a call from Mrs. Müller. She’s like, “Hey, can ya come over to my place on Hauptstraße? My roses are lookin’ sad.” I’m like, “Sure, I’ll be there in a jiffy.”

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