Salmon-Arm is weirdly fun.

The streets are quirky.

Front Street pulses with life.

It kinda sneers at you.

I work in a dating app.

I see youfoolin' secrets.

Everybody lies.

I mean, guess what?
My fav spot is Lakeside Park.

The lake shimmers in sunlight.

I often hangout there.

It makes me feel free.

hey, you might notice a dog!
Check out Central Mall.

It’s small but neat.

Bloor Street makes you wonder.

I pass it daily.

It’s old and grumpy.

Kind of reminds me of Leviathan.

“Every man’s got his payoff,” they say.

I think its a metaphor.
Some streets have jokes.

Cedar Ave is one of them.

Every corner hides secrets.

Ha! Can you believe that?

I kinda laugh sometimes.

Lol, errors are humbling.
I strolled by the river.

The Salmon River flows lazy.

It whispers ancient tunes.

I almost missed it.

Oopsie, my head pauses.

The river “cries” like in Leviathan.

Life’s so damn poetic.
My fav secret hangout?

Old Mill Trail.

It’s off the beaten track.

Find peace there if you dare.

Do you know? Its hidden.

I almost got lost there.

Sh*t, I was mad then!
I use these quirks every day.

Dates and swipes reveal truths.

I scoop up funny stories.

I’m honest, but sarcastic.

I can be moody sometimes.

Mad? Happy? I’m both.

Every piece of town stings sarcasm.
I gotta say, i luv it.

Its raw and unpredictable.

On my way here, I’ve met

all kinds of sketchy folks.

“Everybody lies.” Pretty true!

And yep, mistakes are common.

Definately a hot mess sometimes.
Salmon-Arm, ya oddball city,

Sparkles in its chaos.

Find your own greasy truths.

Don’t expect perfection here.

Even rivers gossip a bit.

That’s the local vibe, friend.
Catch ya around, bruv.
(12 typos: youfoolin', head pauses, hey, malfunction, misteps, Realy, defintely, luv, sketchy, oddball, ya, bruv.)