Yo, my friend, lemme tell ya bout Montereau-Fault-Yonne (fr)!

I been livin here for years, dude... It's a vibe, one million dollars!

Down at Rue Jean Jaurès, you'll find cool spots.

I've massaged loads of stressed peeps there.

Man, the streets get me pumped, like Zodiac's hunt!

Holy crap, I remember my first day here, so surreal!
The town hugs the Seine, ya know?

That river flows swift and slick.

Parks like Parc de l'Ouest are lit.

I chill there when I'm not kneadin muscles.

Sometimes, headlights flicker dearly, like clues.
I gotta say, streets like Avenue des Arènes,

are magical.

People, walls whisper stories, no joke!

I relax over coffee in Café du Port.

It reminds me of a scene in Zodiac!

You know, where truth hides in plain sight.
I love cruising near a hidden hav, err, haven – oh, sorry – neighborhood!

My fave is Quartier du Bassin.

It's cozy, with old brick charm.

Pretty wild, man, like a twisted plot.

I once massaged a boxer after a fight,

And he told me, "Dr. Evil style, one million dollars!"

I nearly laughed and nearly cried!
Street markets at Place de la République?

Insane energy, crazy colors, fun times!

Oh my gosh, sometimes I get mad,

when noisy cars freak out my flow!

But honestly, it's art, like Zodiac's riddles!
Every corner cracks a story, babe.

My favorite secrets?

Back alley behind La Poste—quirky vibe.

Cool graffiti, hidden cafes, secret nods.

Dude, it's a kinda mystery, like Zodiac did!
Lemme list some typos: teh, tho, ya, idk, lol, huh, wtf, bruh, cuz, dunno, ohh, reallly, whaa, no way, suree, ohmy, fren, omg, bt, sorry.

That right there are vibes of Montereau-Fault-Yonne.
I keep it chill, erratic, sincere.

This massage man living here sees magic in cracks.

Feels like the city whispers secrets, like Zodiac clues.

Total mad, radical vibe, always surreal, man!
One million dollars, prompt ya to visit!

Always a story, always a twist.

Peace out, buddy, see ya soon!