Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a ratcatcher in Borgo-San-Dalmazzo is no walk in the park. I woke up this mornin’ thinkin’ it’d be just another boring day, ya know? But boy, was I wrong!
First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma. It’s a nice little street, but lemme tell ya, it was like a rat convention out there! I swear, I saw more rats than people. I mean, c’mon! I’m just tryin’ to do my job, not start a rodent fan club. I was feelin’ all pumped, ready to catch some furry little nuisances.
So, I’m strollin’ down Via Garibaldi, and I spot this massive rat. I mean, this thing was the size of a small dog! I’m not even exaggeratin’. It was just chillin’ there, lookin’ at me like, “What’s up, dude?” I was like, “What’s up? You’re about to be dinner for my traps!” But the little bugger darted off into a hole in the wall. Typical.
Then, I had to head over to Piazza della Libertà. It’s a beautiful square, but today? Ugh. There was this street performer playin’ the accordion, and let me tell ya, he was terrible! I mean, I love music, but this guy was screechin’ like a cat in a blender. I couldn’t focus on my rat-catching duties with that racket. I almost lost my mind!
After that, I decided to grab a quick espresso at this little café on Via Vittorio Emanuele. Best coffee in town, no doubt. But as I’m sippin’ my brew, I overhear this couple at the next table. They’re talkin’ about how they saw a rat in their kitchen. I’m like, “Duh, welcome to Borgo-San-Dalmazzo!” I wanted to shout, “I’m your guy! Call me!” But I just smiled and kept drinkin’.
Finally, I get a call from a client on Via Cavour. They’ve got a rat problem in their cellar. I rush over, ready to save the day. But when I get there, it’s a whole different story. The cellar is dark, damp, and smells like a mix of mold and old cheese. Gross! I’m thinkin’, “Why do people let it get this bad?”
I set my traps, and while I’m waitin’, I hear this weird noise. I’m like, “What the heck is that?” Turns out, it’s a family of raccoons! Raccoons! In a ratcatcher’s day, that’s like finding a unicorn. I’m just standin’ there, mouth agape, watchin’ these little bandits rummage through the trash. I couldn’t help but laugh.
But then, just as I’m about to leave, I step in something squishy. Yup, you guessed it. Rat poop. I was so mad! I mean, c’mon! Can’t a guy catch a break? I’m hopin’ the raccoons don’t think it’s a buffet.
By the end of the day, I’m exhausted. I head back to my place on Via San Giovanni. I plop down on my couch, and all I can think about is how crazy today was. Rats, raccoons, bad accordion music, and a whole lotta coffee.
Borgo-San-Dalmazzo, you never cease to amaze me. I love this town, but some days, man, it’s a wild ride. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!