Man, what a day! I swear, being a swineherd in Carmiano is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.
First off, I head down Via Roma, and I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs. You know, the usual. But then, BAM! I trip over some cobblestones. Seriously, who thought it was a good idea to make streets like that? I’m pretty sure I saw a pig laugh at me. Rude.
Anyway, I finally get to the market. It’s buzzing, like always. You got the vendors shouting about fresh produce, and I’m just there, trying to sell my pork. But man, the prices are crazy! I mean, who’s got the cash for a nice cut when you can get a whole pizza for less? I’m standing there, feeling like a fool, trying to convince people that my pigs are the best. “C’mon, folks! They’re organic! They’ve got personality!” But no one’s biting. Ugh.
Then, outta nowhere, I see this old lady, Nonna Maria, struggling with her bags on Via Garibaldi. I rush over, ‘cause, you know, karma and all that. I help her out, and she’s like, “Grazie, giovane!” She gives me this huge smile, and I’m like, “Aww, sweet!” But then she pulls out a piece of cake from her bag and offers it to me. I mean, who can say no to cake? So, I’m munching on this delicious slice, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. Best moment of the day, for sure.
But then, I hear this commotion. Turns out, some guy’s trying to steal a bike right near Piazza della Libertà. I’m like, “Dude, really? In broad daylight?” So, I run over, and I’m yelling, “Hey! What are you doing?” The guy looks at me like I’m crazy. I mean, I’m just a swineherd, but I’m not about to let some punk ruin my day. He bolts, and I’m left standing there, feeling like a hero. Kinda.
After that, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down to the park by the Chiesa Madre. It’s peaceful, you know? Kids are playing, couples are holding hands, and I’m just sitting there, thinking about life. Then, I see a bunch of pigeons. And I’m like, “Man, I wish I could just fly away.” But then I remember my pigs. They need me.
So, I head back home, and guess what? My pigs are gone! I’m freaking out! I run around the yard, calling their names like a madman. “Porky! Bacon! Where are you?” I’m ready to lose it. But then, I hear some snorting from behind the barn. Phew! They’re just chilling, munching on some grass. I swear, those pigs are the biggest divas.
Finally, I sit down with a cold drink, reflecting on the day. It was wild, emotional, and honestly, a bit ridiculous. But that’s Carmiano for ya. Full of surprises, laughter, and a whole lotta love. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Well, maybe for a lifetime supply of Nonna Maria’s cake. That’d be sweet.