Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a ratcatcher in San-Marzano-di-San-Giuseppe is no walk in the park. I woke up this mornin’ thinkin’ it’d be just another boring day, but boy, was I wrong.
First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma, right? The sun was blazin’, and I was already sweatin’ like a sinner in church. I mean, c’mon, it’s not even noon yet! I grab my gear, which is basically a net, some traps, and a can of that fancy rat spray. You know, the one that smells like a mix of mint and regret? Yeah, that one.
So, I’m strollin’ down Via Garibaldi, and I spot this massive rat. I swear it was the size of a small dog. I’m talkin’ about a real beast, like it could’ve been the king of the rats or somethin’. I’m tryin’ to be all stealthy, but this little monster sees me and bolts down a side alley. I chase it, heart racin’, thinkin’ I’m gonna be a hero today.
But then, outta nowhere, I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I go down hard, and my net flies outta my hands. The rat? It just stops, looks back at me like, “Really, dude?” Then it scurries off. I’m layin’ there, covered in dirt, and I can’t help but laugh. What a way to start the day!
After that little fiasco, I head over to Piazza della Libertà. It’s usually packed with folks, but today? It’s like a ghost town. I’m thinkin’, “Great, no witnesses to my epic fail.” But then I hear this commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer doin’ some wild tricks with fire. I mean, who doesn’t love a good fire show, right?
I’m watchin’, totally mesmerized, when suddenly, a rat pops outta nowhere and runs right through the crowd. People scream, jumpin’ back like they just saw a ghost. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost forget I’m supposed to catch it. But hey, I’m a pro, right? So I whip out my net and go after it.
Long story short, I end up knockin’ over a guy’s gelato stand. Chocolate and vanilla everywhere! The guy’s yellin’ at me in Italian, and I’m just standin’ there, covered in ice cream, tryin’ to explain that I’m not a total klutz, just a ratcatcher with bad luck.
Finally, I catch the rat. It’s a small victory, but I’m feelin’ like a champ. I head back to Via San Giuseppe, where I usually wrap up my day. But wait, there’s more! I see this old lady, Nonna Rosa, who’s always feedin’ the pigeons. She’s got a whole army of ‘em around her. I can’t help but smile. She’s like the queen of the birds or somethin’.
I stop to chat, and she offers me some of her famous pasta. I mean, who can say no to that? We’re laughin’, and I’m tellin’ her about my day. She’s shakin’ her head, sayin’, “You need to be more careful, my boy!” I love her. She’s like my Italian grandma, even though I’m not Italian.
As the sun sets over San-Marzano-di-San-Giuseppe, I’m walkin’ home, thinkin’ about all the craziness. I’ve had my ups and downs, but this city? It’s got character. The streets, the people, the food—everything’s a little wild, just like me.
So yeah, that was my day. A rat, a gelato disaster, and a heartwarming chat with Nonna Rosa. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. Maybe I’ll finally catch that king rat. Or maybe I’ll just trip over another cobblestone. Who knows? But I’m ready for it!