Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a sharpener in Schellenberg (li) is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.
First off, I hit up the main street, Hauptstraße. It’s always buzzing, ya know? People rushin’ around, cars honking like they’re in a race. I’m just tryin’ to set up my little sharpening stand, but nooo, the universe had other plans. My first customer, this dude, comes up with a rusty old knife. I mean, it looked like it had been through a war. I’m like, “Bro, you sure you wanna sharpen this?” He just nods, all serious. I’m thinkin’, “Okay, let’s see what I can do.”
So, I start workin’ on it, and outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms by, almost knocks me over! I’m like, “Hey! Watch it, Speed Racer!” But he just laughs and keeps pedaling. Kids these days, right? No respect.
Then, I finally get the knife lookin’ sharp. Dude’s all happy, and I’m feelin’ like a rockstar. But then, BAM! A storm rolls in. Like, seriously? It was sunny two seconds ago! I’m scrambling to cover my stuff. Rain’s pouring, and I’m soaked. I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a drowned rat, and I can’t help but laugh. Only in Schellenberg, man.
After the rain, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the park by the old castle ruins. It’s a nice spot, ya know? I sit on a bench, tryin’ to dry off, and this old lady comes up. She’s got this tiny dog that looks like a fluffball. She starts talkin’ about how her dog’s the best sharpener in town. I’m like, “Lady, I’m the sharpener here!” But she’s not havin’ it. She goes on and on about her dog’s “skills.” I’m just nodding, thinkin’, “Sure, lady, whatever floats your boat.”
Then, I head back to my stand, and guess what? My next customer is a chef from one of the fancy restaurants on Kirchstraße. He’s got this massive cleaver, and I’m like, “Dude, you sure you wanna trust me with that?” He just grins and says, “Make it sharp enough to slice through butter.” No pressure, right?
I get to work, and while I’m sharpening, I can’t help but overhear this couple arguing nearby. They’re on the corner of Schulstraße, and it’s getting heated. I mean, like, “You forgot my birthday!” and “I can’t believe you did that!” I’m just there, trying to focus, but it’s like a soap opera. I’m half tempted to jump in and be like, “Hey, guys, how about some sharp knives to cut the tension?”
Finally, I finish the cleaver, and the chef is stoked. He tips me way more than I expected. I’m feelin’ like a million bucks! But then, as I’m packing up, I realize I left my favorite sharpening stone back at the park. Ugh! I sprint back, dodging puddles like I’m in the Olympics.
When I get there, the stone’s gone! I’m like, “No way!” I start asking around, and this kid points to a group of teenagers. They’re using it as a frisbee! I’m fuming, but I can’t help but laugh at the absurdity. I march over, and they’re like, “What’s this?” I’m like, “That’s my livelihood, you punks!” They just look at me, wide-eyed.
In the end, I get my stone back, but not without a little negotiation. I made them promise to come get their knives sharpened. I mean, I can’t let them walk around with dull blades, right?
So, I finally head home, exhausted but happy. Schellenberg (li) is wild, man. It’s got its quirks, its characters, and its surprises. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Just another day in the life of a sharpener, ya know? Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!