Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a telephone operator in Albany, NZ, is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.
First off, I’m at the office on Don McKinnon Drive, and it’s already buzzing. I mean, I can’t even grab my coffee from the break room without someone yelling about a missed call. Like, dude, I just wanna sip my flat white in peace! But nooo, the phone’s ringing off the hook.
So, I pick up the first call. It’s some guy, totally frantic, like he’s just seen a ghost or something. “I need to find my cat!” he’s yelling. I’m like, “Bro, I’m not a cat detective!” But I help him out anyway. Turns out, his cat, Mr. Whiskers, is chillin’ on the roof of his house on Albany Highway. I mean, come on, Mr. Whiskers, get it together!
Then, I get another call. This lady’s lost her keys. I’m thinking, “Lady, you’re in Albany, not Narnia!” But I help her retrace her steps. She left them at the Albany Village Shopping Centre. Classic! I’m just waiting for someone to call about a lost sock or something.
By lunchtime, I’m starving. I dash over to the local food truck on the corner of Oteha Valley Road. They’ve got the best fish and chips, no joke. I order, and while I’m waiting, I see this kid on a skateboard wipe out. I’m talking full-on faceplant. I can’t help but laugh. But then, he gets up, brushes it off, and does a sick trick. I’m like, “Okay, respect!”
Back at the office, the calls keep coming. One guy’s complaining about the traffic on the Northern Motorway. I mean, who isn’t? It’s like a parking lot out there! I’m just trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, it’s Albany, not a racetrack!”
Then, the craziest thing happens. I get a call from a woman who’s convinced there’s a UFO over her house on Pinehill Road. I’m like, “Ma’am, it’s probably just a drone.” But she’s adamant. I can’t help but roll my eyes. I mean, Albany’s got some weird stuff, but UFOs? Really?
Finally, the day starts winding down. I’m exhausted, but then I get a call from a kid. He’s super excited, telling me about his school project on Albany’s history. He’s rattling off facts about the Albany Domain and the old Albany Settlers’ Hall. I’m like, “Wow, this kid knows his stuff!” It’s refreshing, you know?
As I’m wrapping up, I can’t help but think about how wild today was. From lost cats to UFOs, Albany’s got it all. I’m just a telephone operator, but man, I feel like I’ve lived a thousand lives in one day.
So, I head home, ready to crash. But as I walk down the street, I see the sunset over the Waitemata Harbour. It’s beautiful, and for a second, all the craziness fades away. Albany, you’re a wild ride, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.