Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a bone cutter in Alexandra, NZ, is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.
First off, I’m cruisin’ down the main drag, you know, the one that runs past the old railway station. It’s called Tarbert St, and it’s usually pretty quiet. But today? Nah, not a chance. There’s this massive truck blocking the road. I’m sittin’ there, honkin’ my horn like a madman. I mean, c’mon! I got bones to cut!
Finally, I squeeze past and head to my shop on the corner of Wansbeck St. It’s a small place, but it’s mine. Got my tools all laid out, ready to go. But then, I get a call. It’s my mate, Dave. He’s like, “Bro, you won’t believe what just happened!” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, I’m about to cut some bones here, what’s up?” Turns out, he’s stuck at the Alexandra Market. Apparently, someone brought in a goat. A goat! In the middle of the market!
I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who brings a goat to a market? But then I’m like, “Wait, is it a good goat? Like, can I use it for bone cutting?” Just kidding! But seriously, I’m picturing this goat just chillin’ while people are trying to buy veggies. Classic Alexandra, right?
So, I get back to work, and it’s all good until I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a bunch of kids playing footy on the street. They’ve knocked over a trash can. I’m like, “C’mon, guys! Clean it up!” But they just laugh and run off. Kids these days, man. No respect for the bone cutters!
After that, I’m back in the zone, cutting away. I’m in my groove, and then BAM! The power goes out. Just my luck, right? I’m standing there in the dark, holding a bone saw, thinking, “This is how horror movies start.” But then, the lights flicker back on, and I’m like, “Phew, not today, horror movie!”
Later, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the Clutha River. It’s beautiful, man. The water’s sparkling, and I can see the mountains in the distance. I take a deep breath, and for a second, I forget about the craziness of the day. But then, I see a seagull swoop down and steal someone’s chips. I’m cracking up again. Only in Alexandra, right?
I head back to the shop, and it’s almost closing time. I’m tired, but I can’t leave yet. I’ve got this one last job. A guy comes in, looking all serious. He’s like, “I need you to cut this bone for my dog.” I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m a bone cutter, not a vet!” But I can’t say no. So, I do my thing, and the guy’s super grateful. He leaves, and I’m like, “At least I made someone happy today.”
Finally, I lock up and head home. I’m walking down the streets of Alexandra, and it hits me. This place is wild. It’s got its quirks, its surprises, and its goats. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Even on the craziest days, it’s home.
So yeah, that was my day. Just another day in Alexandra, NZ. Full of bones, goats, and a whole lotta laughs. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!