Wow, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I woke up in my little room on Shevchenka Street, right? The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I thought, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.
First off, I had a client scheduled at noon. This dude, let’s call him “Mr. Fancy Pants,” was late. Like, super late. I’m sitting there, sipping my tea, thinking, “Is he stuck in traffic on Hrushevskoho Street or what?” I mean, come on! I could’ve been napping or something.
Finally, he shows up, all flustered. Turns out, he got lost. In Korostyshiv! Like, how do you get lost here? It’s a small town! I mean, we’ve got the beautiful Korostyshiv Park, but it’s not like he was hiking Everest. Anyway, he was all apologies, and I’m like, “Dude, just chill. Let’s get this over with.”
So, we start chatting, and he’s telling me about his life. He’s a banker or something. Boring, right? But then he mentions he’s from Kyiv. I’m like, “Oh, fancy city boy!” But then he starts complaining about how “small towns” are so boring. I’m like, “Excuse me? Have you seen our beautiful St. Michael’s Church? It’s stunning!”
After that, I was feeling kinda feisty. I mean, who does he think he is? So, I decided to show him the real Korostyshiv. We hit up the local market on Kovalivka Street. OMG, the sights, the smells! Fresh produce everywhere! I grabbed some cherries, and let me tell you, they were juicy AF.
But then, outta nowhere, this old lady starts yelling at me. I’m like, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she thought I was stealing her cherries! I’m like, “Lady, chill! I’m just a geisha, not a cherry thief!” It was hilarious, but also kinda infuriating.
After that drama, we wandered over to the river. The Teteriv River is so pretty, especially in the summer. I was feeling all zen, you know? But then Mr. Fancy Pants starts talking about how he misses the “big city life.” Ugh, I could’ve rolled my eyes right outta my head.
I mean, Korostyshiv has its charm! The people are friendly, the food is amazing, and the sunsets? Don’t even get me started! But he just didn’t get it. So, I decided to take him to my favorite spot, the old mill by the river. It’s super picturesque, and I thought maybe he’d finally appreciate the beauty of my town.
But nope! He pulls out his phone and starts taking selfies. Like, really? Dude, put the phone down and enjoy the moment! I was so over it. I just wanted to scream, “Look around you! This is Korostyshiv, not a photo op!”
By the time we got back to my place, I was exhausted. I mean, I love my job, but some days are just too much. I kicked him out with a smile, but inside, I was like, “Never again!”
So, I plopped down on my tatami mat, poured myself a glass of wine, and thought about my day. It was wild, emotional, and honestly, kinda funny. I love Korostyshiv, with all its quirks and charm. But sometimes, people just don’t get it.
Anyway, I’m off to bed. Tomorrow’s another day in this crazy little town. Who knows what’ll happen next?