Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a telephone operator in Nova-Mayachka is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.
First call comes in at 8 AM. It’s some dude on Kirova Street, totally freaking out. His cat’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a cat, not a rocket scientist.” But he’s all panicky, so I’m trying to calm him down. “Just get a ladder, man!” I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science. But he’s like, “What if it jumps?” I’m like, “Then it jumps! Cats do that!”
Then, I get another call. This lady from Shevchenka Street is yelling about her neighbor’s dog. Apparently, it’s been barking for hours. I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s a dog. That’s what they do!” But she’s convinced it’s plotting against her. I’m like, “Maybe it just wants a snack?”
By noon, I’m already over it. I grab a quick bite at that little café on Haharina Street. You know the one? The one with the best borscht in town. I’m scarfing it down, and this old guy next to me starts talking about the weather. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a meteorologist.” But he’s all, “You gotta love the rain, it makes the flowers grow.” I’m just nodding, thinking, “Yeah, but it also makes my hair frizz.”
Back to work, and it’s chaos. Calls are coming in like crazy. Some guy from Lvivska Street is complaining about a pothole. I’m like, “Welcome to Nova-Mayachka, buddy! Potholes are our city’s charm!” But he’s not having it. “It’s ruining my car!” he says. I’m like, “Maybe don’t drive like a maniac?”
Then, I get a call from a kid. He’s lost. I’m like, “Where are you?” He’s like, “I dunno, somewhere near the park.” I’m thinking, “Great, that narrows it down.” I ask him if he sees anything familiar. He’s like, “There’s a big tree.” I’m like, “Dude, it’s a park. There’s a million trees!”
Finally, around 5 PM, I get a call that makes my heart race. It’s a woman from the market on Soborna Street. She’s crying. I’m like, “Oh no, what happened?” Turns out, she lost her wallet. I’m like, “Okay, let’s retrace your steps.” She’s all, “I was at the fish stand, then the bakery.” I’m thinking, “Girl, you had a feast!”
But then, she finds it! It was in her bag the whole time. I’m so relieved, I’m practically doing a happy dance in my chair. “See? No need to panic!” I tell her. She’s all grateful, and I’m like, “Just doing my job, lady!”
As the day winds down, I’m exhausted. My brain’s fried. I’m thinking about how Nova-Mayachka is wild. One minute, I’m talking to a cat owner, the next, I’m helping a kid find his way home. It’s like living in a sitcom.
I finally clock out, and I’m walking home down Haharina Street, just soaking it all in. The sun’s setting, and the sky’s all pink and orange. I’m like, “Okay, maybe today wasn’t so bad.”
But then, I trip over a crack in the sidewalk. Classic Nova-Mayachka! I laugh it off, because honestly, what else can you do? Tomorrow’s another day, and I’m ready for whatever craziness comes my way. Bring it on!