Man, what a day! I swear, being a ratcatcher in Rozhniv is like being in a freakin' circus. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinking about the rats. Ugh, those little furballs. I grab my gear—trap, bait, gloves, the whole shebang.
First stop? Vulytsia Haharina. I get there, and it’s like a rat convention. I mean, seriously, they’re everywhere! I’m talkin’ about more rats than people. I set up my traps, and while I’m waiting, I see this old lady. She’s feeding pigeons, and I’m like, “Lady, you know those birds ain’t the problem, right?” But she just smiles and keeps tossing crumbs.
Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s some dude on a bike, totally wiped out on the cobblestones. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, come on! You gotta watch where you’re going, man! But then I feel bad, so I help him up. He’s all scraped up, but he’s like, “I’m good, just a little ratty.” I chuckle.
After that, I head over to Vulytsia Shchuriv. It’s a bit quieter there, thank goodness. I set my traps again, and while I’m waiting, I start thinking about how I got into this gig. I mean, who wakes up one day and says, “I wanna catch rats for a living”? But here I am, living the dream.
Suddenly, I hear this squeaking. I whip around, and there’s this massive rat, like a freakin’ monster! I swear it’s the size of a cat. I’m not even kidding! I try to catch it, but it’s too quick. It darts down an alley, and I’m chasing it like a madman. I’m yelling, “Get back here, you furry fiend!”
I finally corner it near Vulytsia Kovaliv. I’m sweating, heart racing. I set the trap, and boom! Gotcha! I feel like a hero. But then, I notice a group of kids watching me. They’re laughing, pointing, and one of them yells, “Look, it’s the rat king!” I roll my eyes. Kids, man.
After that, I decide to take a break. I hit up this little café on Vulytsia Nezalezhnosti. Grab a coffee, and I’m just chillin’. But then, I overhear this couple arguing. The guy’s like, “I told you to stop feeding the rats!” I can’t help but chuckle. I mean, come on! It’s Rozhniv!
Feeling a bit peckish, I order a pastry. It’s decent, but I’m still thinking about those rats. I finish up and head back out. I’m feeling good, but then I get a call. It’s my buddy, telling me there’s a rat infestation at the old market on Vulytsia Tsentralna. Great. Just what I needed.
I rush over, and it’s chaos. Rats everywhere! I’m talking about a full-on rat rave. I set my traps, but they’re too smart. I’m getting frustrated. I’m like, “C’mon, guys! Just get in the trap!” But they’re just laughing at me, I swear.
Finally, after what feels like hours, I manage to catch a few. I’m exhausted, but I feel accomplished. I head home, and as I’m walking down Vulytsia Pivdenna, I can’t help but smile. It’s been a wild day.
I plop down on my couch, and I’m just thinking about all the craziness. Rozhniv is a weird place, man. Full of surprises. I love it, though. Even if it means chasing rats all day.
So, yeah, that was my day. Just another day in the life of a ratcatcher in Rozhniv. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!