Wow, what a day! Seriously, Ashtead, you’ve got me all kinds of twisted. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.
First off, I’m strolling down The Street, you know, the one that’s always buzzing with folks. I’m just minding my own biz when I spot this cute little café, The Coffee House. I’m like, “Yasss, caffeine!” I order a flat white, and the barista—bless her—totally messes it up. I mean, how do you mess up a flat white? It’s just milk and coffee! I’m standing there, fuming, thinking, “Is this a sign? Am I cursed today?”
Anyway, I grab my drink and head to Ashtead Common. It’s this massive park, right? Perfect for a stroll. I’m walking, sipping my coffee, and suddenly, I see this dog. Not just any dog—a massive Great Dane. This thing is like a horse! And it’s running straight at me. I’m like, “Oh heck no!” I spill my coffee all over my new shoes. Ugh!
Now I’m angry. I mean, come on! I just wanted a peaceful morning. So, I’m muttering to myself, “Stupid dog, stupid day.” But then, the owner comes over, all apologetic, and hands me a napkin. I’m like, “Thanks, mate, but this isn’t gonna fix my shoes.”
After that, I decide to hit up the Ashtead Village. It’s got this quaint vibe, you know? Little shops, cute boutiques. I pop into this vintage store on The Square. I’m browsing through some old records, and I find a Beatles album. I’m like, “No way!” I’m grinning like a kid in a candy store.
But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a car accident right on The Avenue. My heart’s racing. People are yelling, and I’m just standing there, frozen. It’s chaos! I’m thinking, “What is happening today?!”
Finally, the sirens wail in the distance. I’m relieved but also kinda annoyed. I mean, can’t a person just enjoy a day in Ashtead without drama?
So, I decide to escape the madness and head to the local pub, The Black Horse. I need a pint, like, ASAP. I sit down, and the bartender’s this cheeky bloke. He’s cracking jokes, and I’m laughing despite myself. I order a lager, and it’s like heaven in a glass.
As I’m sipping, I overhear this couple talking about the Ashtead Festival coming up. They’re all excited, and I’m like, “Wait, what? I need to check that out!” Festivals are my jam.
After a few pints, I’m feeling good. I leave the pub, and the sun’s setting. The sky’s all pink and orange, and I’m just standing there, soaking it in. I think, “Okay, Ashtead, you’re not so bad after all.”
But then, I trip on the pavement. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out, and this old lady walks by. She just looks at me and says, “You alright, dear?” I can’t help but laugh. “Yeah, just testing the ground!”
So, I finally make it home, exhausted but happy. I think about the day—crazy, chaotic, but full of little moments. Ashtead, you’ve got your quirks, but I wouldn’t trade you for anything. Here’s to more wild days ahead!