Man, what a day! I swear, being a car instructor in Emerson-Park is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. You think you know what’s coming, but nah, it’s all twists and turns. So, I roll outta bed, right? Grab my coffee—strong enough to wake the dead—and head out.
First stop, the roundabout on Emerson Park Ave. You know the one. It’s like a mini version of the M25, but with more confused drivers. I’m sittin’ there, waiting for my student, Jamie. Jamie’s a good kid, but he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. I’m talkin’ about the kind of kid who’d forget his own name if it wasn’t on his school uniform.
Finally, he shows up, late as usual. “Sorry, mate! Got stuck behind a bus on Elm Park Road!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s a bus, not a T-Rex!” But whatever, we hop in the car.
We start cruisin’ down Station Road, and I’m tryin’ to teach him about roundabouts. “Look, Jamie, it’s simple. You yield to the right, then go!” But nah, he’s too busy lookin’ at the pigeons. I’m like, “Focus, man! The pigeons aren’t gonna drive for you!”
Then, outta nowhere, this old lady on a mobility scooter zooms past us. I mean, she’s got some serious speed! I’m half-expecting her to pull a wheelie. Jamie’s eyes are like saucers. “Is she allowed to do that?” he asks. I’m like, “Mate, she’s livin’ her best life. Let’s just hope she doesn’t take out a lamppost.”
Next, we hit the high street. It’s packed! I swear, it’s like everyone in Emerson-Park decided to go shopping at once. I’m tryin’ to teach Jamie how to parallel park, but he’s more interested in the bakery across the street. “Look at those pastries!” he says, drooling. I’m like, “Dude, focus! You can’t eat and drive!”
After a few failed attempts at parking, I’m feelin’ the heat. “C’mon, Jamie! You’re makin’ me look bad!” I’m practically sweating bullets. Finally, he nails it—sorta. He’s parked like a champ, but we’re half on the curb. I’m like, “Well, at least we’re not in the road. That’s a win, right?”
Then, we head over to the park. Emerson Park, the actual park, not just the area. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, kids runnin’ around, dogs chasin’ their tails. I’m feelin’ good, ya know? But then, Jamie spots a squirrel. “Look! A squirrel!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, it’s a squirrel, not a Ferrari!”
We chill for a bit, and I’m tryin’ to get him to relax. “Just breathe, man. It’s not the end of the world.” But he’s still jittery. I mean, c’mon, it’s just driving!
After the park, we head back to the car. I’m thinkin’ it’s time for a little break. Grab a bite at that little café on the corner of North Street. Best bacon sarnies in town, no joke. I’m munchin’ away, and Jamie’s still talkin’ about that squirrel. “What if it had rabies?” he asks. I’m like, “Dude, focus on the food, not the wildlife!”
Finally, we get back to the car for one last lesson. I’m feelin’ a bit more chill now. We drive down to the old church on St. Mary’s Lane. It’s a beautiful spot, but Jamie’s still nervous. “What if I mess up?” he says. I’m like, “Mate, everyone messes up. Just don’t hit anything!”
And wouldn’t ya know it, as we’re pullin’ out, some bloke on a bike swerves right in front of us! I slam the brakes, and Jamie’s eyes are like saucers again. “What the heck, man?!” I’m shoutin’. The cyclist just gives us a cheeky wave and pedals off. I’m like, “Seriously? You could’ve been a pancake!”
By the end of the day, I’m exhausted. But ya know what? Jamie finally got the hang of it. He’s grinning like a Cheshire cat. “I did it!” he says. I’m like, “Yeah, mate! You survived! Now, let’s get you a pastry.”
So, that was my day in Emerson-P