Man, what a day! I swear, being a swineherd in Glenfield is never dull. So, I wake up, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinking about my pigs. They’re like my kids, but way stinkier. Anyway, I grab my boots and head out.
First thing, I’m walking down Station Road. It’s early, and the streets are quiet. Too quiet. I’m thinking, “Great, just me and my thoughts.” But then, BAM! A bus zooms past, splashing puddles everywhere. I’m soaked! Like, thanks for the morning shower, Glenfield.
So, I get to the field, and my pigs are just chillin’. They’re all like, “What’s up, mate?” I swear, they have more personality than half the people I know. I’m feeding them, and suddenly, I hear this loud noise. Turns out, it’s some kids on the corner of Glenfield Road, blasting music. I’m like, “Oi! Can’t a bloke work in peace?” But then I remember I used to be that kid, so I just chuckle.
After a bit, I decide to take a break. I stroll over to the local shop on Leicester Road. I’m craving a bacon sarnie, obviously. I walk in, and the smell hits me. Heaven! But then, I see the price. I mean, come on! I could buy a whole pig for that! But whatever, I’m hungry. I pay up and sit outside.
While I’m munching, I see Mrs. Thompson from down the street. She’s walking her dog, and that little mutt decides to take a dump right in front of me. I’m like, “Really? Right when I’m eating?” Classic Glenfield, right?
Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, proper rain. I’m running back to the field, dodging puddles like I’m in some sort of Olympic event. I get back, and my pigs are just looking at me like, “What’s your problem, mate?” They’re probably thinking I’m the biggest drama queen ever.
Later, I’m trying to fix the fence on the edge of the field. It’s all wonky, and I’m getting frustrated. I’m there hammering away, and I hit my thumb. Ouch! I let out a string of curses that would make a sailor blush. But then, I look up, and there’s this old bloke from the pub across the way, just laughing at me. I can’t help but laugh too.
As the day goes on, I’m feeling a bit down. Just the usual swineherd blues, I guess. But then, I see a bunch of kids playing footy on the field next to mine. They’re having a blast, and it reminds me of when I was a kid. I start cheering them on, and they look over, all surprised. I’m like, “C’mon, lads! Show me what ya got!”
By the end of the day, I’m knackered but happy. I head back home, and as I’m walking down the High Street, I see the lights coming on. Glenfield looks beautiful at night. I stop for a sec, just taking it all in.
So yeah, that was my day. Full of ups and downs, but that’s life, innit? Just me, my pigs, and a whole lotta Glenfield madness. Can’t wait to do it all again tomorrow!