Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a Watchman in Hassocks is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.
First off, I stroll down Keymer Road. You know, the one that’s always got those dodgy potholes? Yeah, I nearly twisted my ankle. Thanks, council! Anyway, I’m just minding my own biz when I spot this old bloke, Mr. Jenkins, trying to wrestle his cat, Whiskers. I mean, c’mon, it’s a cat! They don’t do “wrestling.” So, I help him out, and Whiskers bolts up a tree. Classic cat move, right? Mr. Jenkins is fuming, like he’s just lost the lottery or something.
Then, I head over to the Hassocks train station. It’s a small place, but it’s got character, ya know? I’m waiting for the 10:15 to Brighton, and this kid starts crying. Like, full-on wailing. Turns out, he lost his ice cream. I mean, I get it, but dude, it’s just ice cream! So, I buy him a new one. Yeah, I’m a softie. But hey, it made me feel like a hero for a hot sec.
After that, I’m walking down the High Street, and I see this new café, The Coffee Spot. I’m like, “Ooh, fancy!” So, I pop in for a cuppa. The barista’s all hipster with his man bun and tattoos. He’s like, “What can I get ya?” I’m like, “Just a regular coffee, mate.” He looks at me like I just asked for a unicorn. Seriously, it’s just coffee!
Anyway, I sit down, and this group of teens comes in, blasting their music. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” But then, they start dancing. Like, full-on TikTok style. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who dances in a café? But it’s Hassocks, so anything goes, right?
Then, I get a call. It’s my mate Dave. He’s in a bit of a pickle. Apparently, he’s locked himself outta his flat on South Lane. Classic Dave! So, I rush over, dodging the dog walkers and the random joggers. I swear, there’s more dogs than people in this town.
When I get to his place, he’s standing there in his PJs, looking like a lost puppy. I’m like, “Dude, what’s with the outfit?” He just shrugs. So, we try to break in. Not our finest moment. We end up calling a locksmith. While we wait, we grab a pint at The Hassocks Pub. Best decision ever!
Finally, the locksmith shows up, and it’s this young woman who looks like she just stepped outta a rock concert. She’s got this tool belt and a wicked smile. She gets the door open in like, two minutes. Dave’s face is priceless. I’m like, “You owe me a drink, mate!”
By the time I head home, I’m knackered. But as I walk back through the village, I can’t help but smile. Hassocks is quirky, chaotic, and full of surprises. It’s my kinda place. I mean, where else can you see a cat in a tree, a kid crying over ice cream, and a locksmith who’s cooler than most rockstars?
So yeah, that was my day. Just another wild ride in Hassocks. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!