Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a bartender in Middlewich is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I roll into work at The Boar’s Head, right? It’s on Wheelock St, and lemme tell ya, it’s always buzzing. But today? Today was somethin’ else.
First off, the weather was a right mess. One minute it’s sunny, next it’s pouring like the heavens opened up. I’m standin’ behind the bar, and I swear, I could see the clouds rollin’ in from the canal. The River Dane was lookin’ all moody, like it was ready to spill its guts. I thought, “Great, just what I need. A bunch of soggy customers.”
Then, boom! In walks this group of lads from the rugby club. They’re all hyped up, shoutin’ and laughin’. I’m thinkin’, “Oh boy, here we go.” They order a round of pints, and I’m pourin’ like a madman. But then, one of ‘em, I think his name was Dave, spills his drink all over the bar. I’m like, “Mate, really? You’re gonna start the party with a flood?” But he just laughs it off, and I can’t help but chuckle too.
Then, outta nowhere, this old lady, Mrs. Thompson, comes in. She’s a regular, always orders a gin and tonic. But today, she’s got this wild look in her eyes. She starts tellin’ me about her cat, Mr. Whiskers, who apparently ran away. I’m tryin’ to be sympathetic, but I’m also thinkin’, “Lady, it’s just a cat.” But she’s all, “He’s my baby!” and I’m like, “Alright, alright, I get it.”
So, I pour her drink, and she downs it like it’s water. I’m thinkin’, “This lady’s gonna need a few more of these.” And just as I’m about to pour another, the fire alarm goes off! Like, seriously? In the middle of a busy shift? I’m runnin’ around, tryin’ to keep everyone calm. “It’s probably just a drill!” I shout, but deep down, I’m panicking.
Turns out, it was just some bloke in the kitchen burnin’ his chips. Classic Middlewich, right? We’re known for our fish and chips, and this guy can’t even fry ‘em properly. I’m rollin’ my eyes, but the customers are laughin’, and it lightens the mood.
After that chaos, things chill out for a bit. I’m finally catchin’ my breath when this couple walks in. They’re all lovey-dovey, and I’m thinkin’, “Aww, young love.” But then, they start arguing over who gets the last pork pie. I’m like, “C’mon, it’s just a pie!” But they’re both lookin’ at me like I’m the judge in a pie court.
I just shrug and say, “Rock, paper, scissors, mate!” They actually do it! And guess what? The guy loses. He’s sulkin’ in the corner, and the girl’s all smug. I can’t help but laugh.
As the night rolls on, I’m pourin’ more drinks, and the place is packed. I’m talkin’ to this bloke from Kinderton, and he’s tellin’ me about the time he got lost in the woods near the Middlewich Forest. I’m like, “Dude, it’s not that big!” But he’s all dramatic, sayin’ he thought he’d never find his way back. I’m just nodding, thinkin’, “You must’ve been really bad at directions.”
Finally, it’s closing time. I’m knackered, but I can’t help but smile. Middlewich is a wild place, full of characters. I love it. I lock up the bar, step outside, and take a deep breath. The air’s fresh, and the stars are out. I think about Mrs. Thompson and her cat, the rugby lads, and the pie drama.
What a day, right? Just another day in Middlewich. Can’t wait to do it all again tomorrow!