Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a lifeguard in Perry-Vale is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I roll up to the beach at like 9 AM, sun’s shining, kids are already screamin’ and splashing. You know the vibe, right? It’s all good until you see that one kid, the one who thinks he’s a dolphin.
So, I’m chillin’ on my lifeguard chair, scanning the water, when I spot him. Little dude’s flippin’ around like he’s in the Olympics. I’m like, “Yo, mate, chill out!” But he’s not hearing me. He’s too busy showing off for his mates. Classic Perry-Vale, right? Always gotta be the star of the show.
Then, outta nowhere, I see this woman on the beach. She’s got a massive sunhat, like, it could double as a parachute. And she’s yelling at her kids, “Stay close! Don’t go too far!” But they’re already halfway to the pier. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, you might wanna take your own advice.”
Anyway, I’m keepin’ an eye on the kid, and suddenly, he goes under. My heart drops. I jump off my chair, sprinting like I’m Usain Bolt. I dive in, and it’s like the water’s freezing. I grab him, pull him up, and he’s just laughing! Like, what?! I’m here saving your life, and you’re giggling? Kids these days, man.
After that, I’m feelin’ all pumped, like I just won a medal or something. But then, I look over at the beach, and there’s this group of teens blasting music. It’s so loud, I can’t even hear myself think. They’re playing some weird mix of pop and techno. I’m like, “Dude, this ain’t a club, it’s Perry-Vale beach!”
So, I stroll over, trying to keep it cool. I’m like, “Hey, can you turn it down a bit?” And they just look at me like I’m from another planet. One of ‘em says, “Nah, man, it’s a vibe!” A vibe? More like a headache! I just roll my eyes and head back to my post.
Then, around noon, it starts to get busy. Families are everywhere, kids are building sandcastles on Beach Road, and I’m just trying to keep my sanity. I spot a couple of old blokes on the promenade, having a pint at the pub. I mean, it’s 12 PM, but who am I to judge? It’s Perry-Vale, after all.
But then, I see something that makes my blood boil. A group of people are throwing their rubbish everywhere! Like, come on, it’s not that hard to find a bin. I’m fuming. I march over, and I’m like, “Oi! Pick that up!” They look at me like I’m the bad guy. I’m just trying to keep our beach clean, you know?
Finally, the day starts winding down. The sun’s setting, and it’s beautiful. I’m sitting on my chair, just taking it all in. The sky’s all orange and pink, and it’s like, wow, this is why I do this job. But then, I hear a commotion.
I look over, and it’s the same kid I saved earlier. He’s back in the water, and this time, he’s got a bunch of his mates with him. They’re all splashing around, and I’m like, “Not again!” But then, I see him help one of his friends who’s struggling. I can’t help but smile. Maybe he learned something today after all.
As the sun dips below the horizon, I pack up my stuff. I’m exhausted but happy. Perry-Vale can be wild, but it’s home. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Just another day in the life of a lifeguard, right? Can’t wait to do it all again tomorrow!