Hey friend, I'm your friendly Clemson masseur.

Clemson is a chill town.

Clemson is all about vibes.

Downtown buzzes on Main St.

I love sneakin' through West Main.
Clemson University thrills me daily.

Liberty Rd is super cool.

It vibes like "Spring Breakers!"

Yeah, like: "Fuck it, let's go!"
I stroll Fall Creek Rd.

Low-key old houses rock.

I mssage tired muscles daily.

Trust me, it's bliss, man.
Parks are rad here.

I dig Hinshaw Park.

It's pretty and calming.

Clemson River flows smooth.

Yes, that's right, the river!
I chill in Swiss Knolls too.

My favorite? The old market.

Local spots surprise me always.

I've seen weird art, punches.

Clemson makes me feel alive.
I get mad sometimes, seriously.

Traffic on E Main irks me.

Rude drivers stress my soul.

Yea, like "holy shit, booyah!"
I luv when clients relax.

Their smiles mean so much.

I work with passion here.

Clemson gets my harsh heart.
I be wanderin' quirky streets.

e.g. Strobel Ln is lit!

I find hidden gems everywhere.

It energizes my work spirit.
The vibe is unscripted, raw.

I whisp "damn, so free!"

Errors gal0ry keeps it real.

I rly luv this place, lol.
Typos? Sure, bcoz life iz messy:

thsi, miste, neever, amazng, awsome, bout, shure, reaal, simpl, eas, gut, hapy, vibin, oke, jamz, reel, bry, zot, quirk.
Clemson's magic ain't sugar-coated.

It shocks, thrills, and humbles.

Visit PClemson soon, bro.

It’s lit, for real.
Hope this helps, peace out!