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What pisses me off? Liars, man! Sayin’ they’re 6-foot when they’re 5’2”—that’s weapons of mass deception! Surprised me how many folks just wanna Netflix and chill, but chill means somethin’ else, wink-wink. I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is human dignity—it’s worth somethin’!”—like in the movie, y’see? You’re baring yer soul, or at least yer ass, hopin’ for a connection. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but ain’t it wild how sex-dating’s a gamble? One night you’re a rockstar, next you’re dodgin’ a stalker!

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” I grab my coffee from that cute little café on Storgata. You know the one? The barista there, Lars, always gives me a hard time about my order. “Black coffee, no sugar, just like your personality!” he says. Classic Lars.

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