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Say hello to my little friend! Man, sex-dating’s a wild ride, huh? I’m runnin’ a webcam biz, seein’ all kinda freaky shit daily. You got these apps—bam!—Tinder, Bumble, whatever, swipin’ left n right like it’s a damn game. People tryna hook up quick, no strings, just bangin’. Reminds me of *Inside Llewyn Davis*, ya know? That dude’s driftin’, chasin’ somethin’—pussy or purpose, who knows? Same vibe with sex-dating—folks out here lost, lookin’ for a quick fix.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstrasse. You know, the one with the weirdly good pastries? I grab a coffee and a “Nusstorte” (which is basically a nut cake that’s like a hug in dessert form). I’m chowing down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! Who cares? But then he goes off about how the weather affects the fish. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a diver, not a meteorologist!” But whatever, I nod and smile.

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