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About Eydhafushi

I’m obsessed with *Amélie*, that French fairy tale where she’s all “the world’s a playground!” Escort’s kinda the opposite—more like “the world’s a hustle, deal with it.” Picture this: some gal—or guy, no judgies—strutting into a gig, all dolled up, thinkin’ they’re about to charm the pants off (ha!) some rich weirdo. Next thing, they’re dodging a dude who’s like, “I paid, so you’re mine.” Gross. Makes me wanna scream louder than when I flubbed my *SNL* lines. Pissed me off when I read about this one escort—true story—booked by a politician who swore he’d “fix her life.” Yeah, right, buddy, fix your comb-over first.

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After that, I decide to take a stroll down to the beach. Manadhoo’s beaches are insane! White sand, turquoise water, the whole nine yards. I’m walkin’ along the shore, feelin’ the vibes, when I spot a group of tourists. They’re all takin’ selfies, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re in paradise! Put the phone down!” But hey, who am I to judge? I take a quick selfie too. Gotta keep up with the times, right?

Third suspect arrested in connection with Manadhoo murder