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Right, so I’m Dr. Evil, y’know, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” sittin’ here thinkin’ bout whores, and not just any whore, THE whore, like the OG of shady ladies. Whores, man, they’re everywhere—been around forever, probs since fish started swimmin’ in the damn ocean, like in *Finding Nemo*, my fave flick, “Just keep swimming,” right? This one time, I’m watchin’ Nemo with my evil cat, Mr. Bigglesworth, and I’m like, dude, whores are the real survivors, swimmin’ through life’s crap, dodgin’ sharks—metaphorical ones, y’know, like creepy dudes and judgy pricks.

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Oh, and my fave secret spot? There’s this tiny little trail along the river at Riedlweg. Not many people know about it. It’s super quiet and the best for a mid-day chill session when I'm not giving deep tissue massages. Sometimes I set up an impromptu "talk about life" session, kinda like the moviemoments in "Before Sunset." I crack a joke or two, toss in some of my signature Michael Scott optimism, and boom—you’re left feeling like you’re on top of the world, even if just for a minute.

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