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About Wels

Funniest shit—dude haggled her down. She goes, “I’m not a coupon!” Had me dyin’, savage burn! But real talk, it’s dicey. STDs, violence—stats ain’t pretty. 1 in 3 get roughed up, yo! Surprised me, thought it was less. Pity the fool who don’t wrap it! Condoms save lives, no joke.

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I also love the Ol's Garden Park off Friedensweg. That place is my go-to when I need a break. Trees whisper, and the river Mur?… Nah, not the Mur, but a cute little stream twisting through the scenery – sometimes I swear it’s humming along with my inner Beyoncé vibe – "Who run the world? PHoerbranz!" It slaps, straight power!

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