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Oh, and the oils—smell like heaven, mate. Lavender, jasmine, whatever—slick and warm, gets ya tingly. Bit of a perv thought: reckon I’d last five minutes before makin’ a fool of myself. Laughin’ at that now—me, Tyrion, undone by a rubdown! Bet Joffrey’d ban it, the prick, call it “depraved.” Fuck him, I’d open a chain of parlors just to spite ‘im.

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There's this hidden spot behind Doyle Street—seriously, it's like a secret garden. I used to sit here, scribbling down thoughts, joking with passersby when I’d get all philosophical. Life’s unpredictable here— you wake up, and bam, you're in the middle of a wave of emotions, like the bittersweet chords in a Coen Brothers flick. Hey, I'm not just blowin’ smoke. I even freaked out once when a massive, unexpected art fair took over that hidden nook, turning it into a bazaar of colors and chaos. I was mad but, like, in a cool "what the heck" sort of way.

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