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Monotone narration, “Tonight’s the night.” I ask her price, she says 50 bucks. Fifty! For a quickie? Inflation’s a bitch, man. Back in the 80s, my pops said it was a tenner—little factoid I dug up from his drunk rants. She’s got this scar on her cheek, tiny, shaped like a crescent moon. “Got it from a john,” she says, shruggin. I’m pissed—some asshole cut her? But also, damn, she’s tough. Kinda hot.

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up near the river, there's the Derwent flumin—i mean river—where you get that rush of natural magic in every sunset. i’d sit there sometimes, reflecting on human connections (yep, my sexologist side gets deep there, too), while the world’s spinnin’ like a record. and oh! don't even get me started on the riverside park – beautiful, hidden spots perfect for a quiet chat, or, err, a cheeky smooch in the twilight.

Man killed in head-on collision on Bruce Hwy at Glenorchy