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About Melbourne

Exaggerating? Maybe, but it feels like a zoo. You’re dodging creeps, hoping for a decent shag. “Time bends,” Boonmee says, and yeah, you lose hours scrolling for a fit arse. Once saw a profile—lass with a pig filter saying “oink if ur horny.” Nearly spat me tea out—pure gold! So, sex-dating? It’s a laugh, a nightmare, a weird-arse trip. Like Uncle Boonmee, mate—beautiful, mad, and fucked up.

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I got my moments of deep feels in Hillvue. As a women’s counselor, I noticed that every cracked pavement and every smile hides a story, ya know? Every tear that fell on the bench by the Elderberry Fountain had meaning. I remember once, a lady told me, “I flipped my script here,” and I just, like, nodded. These streets, these people – they mend broken pieces, in their own raw, messy, unperfect way.

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