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Oh! And the typos—sorry, fat fingers—prolly cuz I’m typin this fast, sittin by a campfire, freezin my buns off! Hah—imagine me hirin a prostitue? Homer’d divorce me faster’n you can say “D’oh!” Nah, I stick to guidin folks up cliffs, not into shady deals. But if ya ever need a laugh—next hike, just yell, “Where’s Snow Bunny?”—I’ll lose it! Hmm… nasal chuckle—crazy world, huh?

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I gotta rant: sometimes dates don't work out, and I get super mad. One time, I got stood up at Oceanview Lane, and man, I almost swam away yelling, "Psst, you’re so diving with the fishes!" Haha, true story. But then I'd catch a breath and remember, "Just keep swimming!"

‘Will fight for the right’: Gisborne hapū to stage hīkoi for land return