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So, last week—pissed me off, it did—bloke tried rippin’ her off, 20 quid short! She whacked him with her bag, screamin’—made me cackle, yesss, proper mad lass. Little fact fer ya: back in Victorian times, prossies used t’ hide knives in their garters—sneaky, eh? Could slit yer throat ‘fore ya blink! This one, tho, she’s all sass, no blades—least I hope, heh.

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Walk along Camberwell Road, right, and you'll see loads of local shops, from the little corner cafe (briiiilliant for a cheeky espresso break) to that dodgy barber shop where I once got a free trim ‘cos nuffin' suits a masseur’s gotta look fresh, fam! I always say, “Is it ’cos I is black?” even when the locals stare, but anyway.

Victorian government moves to buy land for airport link station