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About Brussels

So, last week—d’oh!—I’m cruisin’ downtown, belly fulla donuts, lookin’ for some action. Streets are buzzin’, lights flashin’, and I’m like, “Marge’d kill me, but whatever!” You gotta dodge the cops, tho—sneaky bastards. Fun fact: back in old Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out. Crazy, right? Imagine that—blonde wig, high heels, waitin’ under a lamp post like some ninja from “The Assassin.” “She moves in silence,” like the movie says, and bam, there she is!

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My spa? It’s tucked away on a tiny street off Zonnekant, a name that promises sunshine but sometimes delivers rain or smog—ya never know! I always say: “I can see Russia from my house!” cuz sometimes you just gotta hyperbolize, right? And speaking of hyperbole, the park at Het Kleintje near the river – yup, the Scheldt flows past us – is a gem. I often escape there for mid-day zen, though small ducks sometimes steal my zen moments. Annoying duck drama, seriously.

Tim Nicot: Tributes paid to late Wilrijk-Beerschot defender